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Original Source: DR MARTIN ROBERTS  03 JULY 2011  
By Dr Martin Roberts
26 July 2011


Larger than life American Magicians, Penn & Teller, currently auditioning prospective Las Vegas stage acts via their U.K. T.V. programme 'Fool Us,' have unfortunately been denied the chance to assess potential illusionists Kate and Gerry McCann. Despite the variety of candidates already examined, nothing of what they have been presented with so far quite compares to the remarkable abilities of the duo McCann. 

Kate McCann's 'Madeleine,' written as it must have been under the watchful eye of her legal advisors, and promoted as an 'account of the truth,' sets forth particulars of Tuesday May 1, 2007 which include the following:


"One of my photographs is known around the world now: A smiling Madeleine clutching armfuls of tennis balls." (The very same photograph Rachael Oldfield ascribes to Jane Tanner during her Rogatory interview).


"In the afternoon Gerry and I decided to take the children down to the beach...we wanted to do something different with them, just the five of us." (p.57. Note: they all go to the beach).


This is followed by a 'Woman's Own' style description of rain, discomfort, and agonising over who should fetch the ice creams.


"Having polished off her ice-cream, Madeleine asked if she could go back to the Mini Club now, please." (p.58)


After a paragraph defending the significance of all the trivia Kate and Gerry have seemingly worked so hard to recall, and the importance of its accuracy, Kate explains how the parents duly comply with their daughter's request:


"We dropped the kids off at their clubs for the last hour and a half, meeting up with them as usual for tea." (p.59).


Drum roll. Curtains back. Big reveal.


And there's Gerry already signing Madeleine into her 'lobster' group at the Mark Warner creche at 2.30 p.m. on the afternoon of Tuesday May 1; not for the last hour and a half as you might expect either. Far from being signed out again at 4.00 p.m., Madeleine is not signed out at all.


And if you think that's an astonishing feat of teleportation, you'll no doubt be amazed to discover that, at the very same time (2.30 p.m.) Kate McCann is elsewhere signing both Sean and Amelie into their 'jellyfish' group, where they stay for fully two hours and fifty minutes, before Kate signs them out again (at 5.20 p.m).


The illusion is made all the more impressive by the two childcare facilities not being equidistant from either the beach or the McCanns' apartment ("Sean and Amelie were enrolled in the Toddler Club for two-year-olds in a building...just across from our apartment on the other side of the main pool...Madeleine's group, the Mini Club for three-to-fives, was slightly further away...").


Penn and Teller would no doubt be disappointed to learn they have missed this trick. The ice creams were clearly a distraction - or should that be misdirection?


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